California QueenJanuary 21, 2007
You may have already read this on the site, but it’s revised.
For those of you who have not read it: it’s a bit more realistic than most of my stuff. Hardly my attempt at a war story, but probably the closest I will ever get: California Queen
This is my favorite of the group. Illustrates the fact that loneliness can sometimes be worse when you are not alone. Also how war changes people, sometimes for the worse. Good use of metaphors and similies - not overworked. Might rethink the mucus ball puke thing. Somehow seemed out of context.